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New Mask Mandate is The World’s Greatest Tragedy

BY: Amelia Kwan:

If you thought that systemic and institutional racism are the most grave injustices of today, then you are sorely mistaken. Climate change? Absolutely insignificant. Sexism, war, civil strife, famine - problems so inane that it is our duty to immediately stop squandering away time worrying about them.

Why? Because right now, there is a far more disastrous issue at hand. It is now mandatory for people to wear masks inside.

As of July 7th 2020, wearing a mask or face covering are required in indoor public spaces (City of Toronto By-Law 541-2020). This includes stores, public transit, and shopping areas along with other indoor public areas. This policy has taken effect in several cities across Canada, as well as in over 20 states in America. The number of mask laws across North America continues to increase as city councils vote on potential policies.

It’s all over, folks. Our country has become nothing short of an authoritarian regime. Forcing people to wear masks in order to protect them and their loved ones from COVID-19 is akin to stripping them of all their human rights and oppression via mouth/nose coverage.

Not only this, but the government and healthcare system are plotting to pick us all off one by one. How, you ask? Protective masks are the deadly new killer that eliminates its victims by causing hypoxia and suffocating its victim. It’s certainly a creative way to suppress overpopulation.

I mean, masks causing hypoxia is a theory that originated from the Internet and has repeatedly been debunked by scientific research, but who cares about science anyway? Also, the Earth is flat. 

If you want to show your strength as a strong, independent individual with free-will, just do like this Kentucky woman and cut a hole in your mask:

This genius Kentucky woman is a unique species that was caught on video shopping with a hole in her protective mask (source: NY Daily News)

I promise you won’t look like a complete idiot.

Kentucky has over 19,000 confirmed COVID cases and over 600 deaths, but that’s irrelevant because now it’s a little bit easier for this woman to breathe.

Although, it will probably be a lot harder for her to breathe if she gets COVID-19 rather than if she wears a proper mask for a few minutes.

In all seriousness, I would love to meet with her and try to understand exactly what’s behind all the self-righteous stupidity. I think the following questions are in order:

1. What is the purpose of the mask if it has a hole over your nose and your mouth, where contagious droplets are spread from? Is it for decorative purposes? If so, then I’m praying to the Lord that you aren’t employed in fashion or design.

2. How could you ever trust a surgeon wearing a mask if they’re obviously going to keel over and pass out during your heart surgery due to hypoxia?

3. How would you feel if your dentist didn’t wear a mask and accidentally coughed while your mouth was wide open and in close quarters? Well it doesn’t matter because at least it’s easier for them to breathe.

She might as well have not worn a mask at all. Cutting a hole in your mask and calling it “effective” is like taking a condom and cutting a big hole in the top before using it. Or you can do both, and find yourself with a kid in nine months if you don’t die of COVID first.

So put on a mask, or you might just end up in the latest YouTube compilation of “Covidiots.”

Toronto mask by-law directive:


Toronto bylaw legal document:


Mandatory mask laws are spreading in Canada (CBC):


More than 20 states require face masks in public:


NY Daily News (Image source):


Kentucky COVID cases count:


*All arguments made and viewpoints expressed within Youth In Politics and its nominal entities do not necessarily reflect the views of the writers or the organization as a whole.


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